The relationship with the toilet - Vinegar

So this one isn't about the pregnancy...
ok who am I kidding...yes it is!
Now a days everything is about the pregnancy...but this post is a little different.
It's about the 7th month relationship that I now share with my toilet...
The shit pot - which I have begun to have new respect for because of its many uses during pregnancy - is no longer the shit pot!
Its the one thing that welcomes you on all your bad days of nausea, constipation, segmented peeing (will come to that later) and some very weird mood swings.
I have spent many days where I was in the toilet for more time than in the bed room and if the occasion was of nausea, my husband was in there with me as well... mostly patting my back and then cleaning after me(while I tried to do it on my own, there is only so much energy you have after a point).

So here goes....

Most mornings in my first trimester were spent saying Good (don't want to use the word "bad" or "Pukish") Morning to the shit pot(whom I am naming "Mr. POT") before I had any human contact! Now ofcourse, you'd say why didn't you eat something early in the morning - that prevents nausea etc etc. trust me you've got to go when you've got to go... the bile rising up sometimes doesn't care a damn about the early morning apple... if it has his way, the apple would be its trigger and naturally the first thing out of you.

And then of course, is the time when you brush your teeth and those of you who like me have a habit of cleaning the tongue rigorously well if you happen to be pregnant(talking to only the women here), be ready for the another 5 min with Mr.Pot - cleansing has a definite attraction for the gastric juices jumping right up.
All this time, when you are staring down Mr.Pot, he looks back at you in a way which says, don't worry let it all come and I will surely flush it all out...and the next time you return, I will be ready.

And return you will, your next session would be actually shitting...(I know I am using really crass language but trust me once the baby is out, I like many of my friends would learn to use the word "duck" instead of ...oh you know what I mean).... so coming back to where I was, shitting isn't the same when you are pregnant... u have got to ease it out, apply less pressure and let your body relax...if you don't already have the habit of reading in the toilet, my 2 words of advice... ACQUIRE IT!
I would often decide on what segment of the morning newspaper I wanted to read based on how much I was going to crap and how easy or tough would today be(trust me, you know when its going to be tough).
This doesn't make the experience enjoyable but definitely helps keep your mind off the now very sleepy bum.
There were times when I could actually sit on a chair and feel less comfortable than how I felt sitting on Mr.Pot...guess, habits change! And hope they change again soon..

Moving on, so in the beginning of the post I was talking about segmented peeing... when you move in the third trimester and the baby...the cutest baby ever is squirming and shifting and kicking and punching...innocently it would press against your bladder...and no not in one go where things might gush out but slowly slowly...
So here is how it works... you go to sleep say at 11:15 after having completed your night time chores which includes spending a good amount of time in the toilet and you get up at 12...in about 5-7 min you have gotten out of bed and reached the toilet(not counting the time taken to reach the toilet from the bathroom) and you sit and pee; you feel better get up...return....take another 5-7 min to lie down and another couple to go back to sleep.... 12:30 you are up again, feeling that you weren't done then... you follow the same routine as above...only this time the pee is nothing beyond couple of drops...and you curse as you are feeling sleepy and you are not quite done yet... you get up....look back at Mr.Pot who gives you a look "are you really done"... you contemplate and say no and sit back....this time hoping it would be more...another drop ... you wash up and go back to bed wondering how much time it would now take to go to sleep.
You get back.... not so sleepy any more... take your mobile...check facebook...twitter....news sites....and in no time an hour has passed and you are really sleepy but as you are closing your eyes...your bladder sends you a message...go pee to sleep peacefully.... naive that you are, you fall for it and not only do you get in a loop, you have partially lost your sleep...feeling a little acidic(get acidity I mean)..so you either take a gulp of medicine or a glass of cold milk and pray to God that please please ....let me sleep now.
And finally you will, you won't know what time...but you will and if God willing, you are in deep sleep you won't wake up again beyond 2-3 times.
Slowing you will get in a routine where you might train yourself to sleep instantly and you might as well acquire that habit because trust me...it would help you in the long run even after you become a mother (or so I am told).

okay written enough...Mr.Pot beckons me...and like in any relationship i have treated him equally well..he gets a nice bath every other day and is rinsed and squeaky clean for our next adventure together..

For those of you who are going through this...treat your Mr.Pot well...he will be your strong, silent companion in your tiring and sleepless days and nights!

Journey to being a mother - TAMARIND!

I am on my way to being a mom soon...completed my 7th month and onto the 8th.
The journey so far has been extraordinary...before you reach any conclusions about me talking about the beauty of the pregnancy and how I cherished the experience, let me stop you right there. Infact, if you are reading this thinking that this blog is any kind of encouragement in any way to those who want to be moms, don't read on.
Let me put in a disclaimer before I start...I want to be a mother.... motherhood is a unique experience and it happens to every one differently and every one reacts to it differently so what happens to me might not happen to you. If after all the warnings, you are still reading this, then well, what can I say.... Read on!!!

Now I didn't become pregnant by accident, my husband and I wanted a baby and while we were told it would take couple of months and we planned an entire Italy vacation to "plan" the baby, we got lucky much before the trip and as you might have imagined, the trip didn't happen. Anyway, you don't grieve over a cancelled trip when you have just received the most life altering supercalifragilisticexpialidocious news of your life.
So my husband and I hugged and kissed and announced the news to all our near and dear ones. Little did I know then that while the baby will happen to both of us, generating another life from within yours is the toughest thing ever and what followed were innumerable rounds to the loo - so you go to puke and then you come out to realize you wanna pee, and while you are on your way out, how about puking some more. As a result, you now have acidity which is an obvious result of bile rising up your system and may have constipation cuz you vomitted all the fluids out. And don't forget about the hundred new things that will cause the nausea and you would want to kill the next person who gives you an advice on how to kill the nausea cuz none of the tricks work.
People might tell you...eat whatever you want...because the truth is well there is hardly anything you will be able to tolerate and eat! Infact, my first trimester seemed more like me turning into a hound... heightened sense of smell, hair growth, pimples on the skin, drooling, puking what one eats and irritated all the time.
Ofcourse, many women have it easier but I wasn't one of them.

The biggest problem in the 9 months are the many advises people would dole out at you..So have apple - prevents acidity, but don't have it as it causes constipation. Have papaya - good for baby, but don't have it as it causes miscarriage.
You won't know what hit you till one day out of frustration you would just give it all up and like a sane person only listen to your doctor. Trust me, if anyone knows what to do, they do.

There is a big difference between how the east and the west look at bringing the baby to the world...while the west would talk about gearing up to welcome the baby which means a baby shower would have gifts for the baby, the east would focus its attention on the mother and not talk about gifts for the baby till the baby is out. They would celebrate the mother which is actually pretty good cuz we all know that once the little thing is out, no ones going to care a damn about us.

Moving on, right from the time I hit my 2nd trimester I was waiting for the very popular first kick. And my baby - smart kid that it(I still don't know if its a boy or a girl)is decided to give a nice one while I was sitting in a meeting. LOL! You can imagine how I felt...I didn't know whether to laugh or cry - I was overjoyed yes but showing the same to a bunch of senior managers didn't seem like the most intelligent thing to do!!! But then no happiness can last that long, soon those cute kicks became practiced punches and shots and I still have a big hunch that I am going to give birth to PO - the kungfu Panda... And the places it aims, Lets just say I am glad that women don't have balls.

Wait, I am not done yet..nights are the biggest problem times, you don't know which way to turn, how to turn, how to turn back, how to get up and lie down, and how to do it all in less than 15 min. Everytime you have to pee, and trust me, you want to pee at least 4 times during the night and everytime you get up from the pot, you know in your heart, you aren't done yet. The whole seemingly easy exercise takes not less than 10 min so sound sleep already evades you. On top of it, if you have woken up the baby, you've had it! You are so doomed that you just pray and pray that the baby goes to sleep and then so can you, but like me if you are working, it won't leave you much time and soon its time to get ready and run to work.

If you are still reading this then read one last thing: Pregnancy is not just what people make it out to be. It is the toughest thing you'd ever do. You have all the right to crib and cry, all the right to curse.
But(here's the silver lining)trust me through all the problems, issues, late nights, constipated nights, acidity, nausea, feet swelling, back aches - not once would you ever think that this was a mistake because it isn't! its just hell and it precedes the biggest joy in your life! The very thought of holding that baby in my arms has kept me going and ofcourse, if you are as lucky as I am and have been blessed with the most supportive husband in the world then you'd make it as well!